After You’ve Gone to Court

"So I reported that I was abused by Nassar in 2016. I was lucky, because he did plead guilty to charges, so I didn’t have to testify in court, but the victim impact statements were allowed to be read in 2018, so there was still a two year-long wait. But leading up to that point, you’re constantly thinking about the next steps in the court process. I don’t want to say you’re looking forward to it, but it’s always kind of a distraction. So, before he pled guilty, there’s always paperwork, there are motions, things to focus on. And then after I read my impact statement, then there was nothing, and I don’t want to say to look forward to, but I was not able to focus on the different aspects of the court process. So, I was stuck with all of the emotions that I wasn’t really dealing with.

So, of course, after sentencing, he was basically sentenced to life, so for the first few weeks, I felt, you know, an extreme high. I was relieved, excited. And then gradually, it kind of turned into this emptiness, because I was starting to realize how much I was still hurting and how much I needed to heal. So, during that emptiness, it kind of then gradually went into more of a depression, and it got into pretty severe depression, which I will talk about a little bit later. But in terms of the court process, I want others to be prepared for the aftermath of the court process and what comes next. And to be prepared for, you know, that emotional rollercoaster. Obviously, everybody experiences things differently, but this was my experience. So, what I wish I would have done is to be prepared a bit more. So to have, you know, family and friends around, making plans throughout, you know, the upcoming weeks, so you have something to look forward to that’s fun or just distracting. I would have also signed up for, you know, some type of community class, whether you’re into yoga, or dance, or pottery, or you want to take another college course. That would have been a good distraction for myself. I also wish I would have had therapy sessions scheduled out. It’s sometimes very difficult to get appointments with therapists, so I should have scheduled them out, you know, weekly or twice a week, right after court and for a few months out, so that way I had that support, and could look forward to that support.

Another thing I wish I would have done was to, you know, gather different materials that you like to do. So, for example, I like to use adult coloring books, so I wish I would have gotten a few of those, along with some, you know, markers. I also like to paint, so I could have gotten painting supplies or things like that. It was also suggested to make like a movie and TV list of, you know, different shows or movies that you want to watch. Obviously being very aware of the content of those movies, but that way you’re not constantly, you know, searching for that type of material.

So those are a few things that I wish I would have done, and what happened to me after the court process. And, I hope that helps you in your journey through court and through your healing process."